Career Advice from my Mother

So appealing to Oprah isn't doing anything, which may have more to do with the fact that I just speak out loud to her in the hopes my small voice will travel half-way across the United States and into her Harpo Studio ear via THE SECRET. Applying to every job imaginable did not work. Getting an MFA did nothing. And lying on my resume, like not seriously lying, but sort of making a lot of shit up, does not seem to help. Now I did not ask my mom for career advice, but after another phone call of me whining and complaining, she decided to take matters into her own hands. Here is the sageness that was administered moments ago:

Mom: Honey, I read this NY Times article, and I wished I saved it, but it said that some boy, who was having trouble finding a job, sent in a cartoon with his resume, and now he works at the company! Maybe you could do something like that.

Me: I can't draw.

Mom: Well, it's worth a try. It certainly worked for him.

I'll save you the trouble of clicking on the link above and reading the article. First of all this happened like a decade ago, while I was still in high school, and second - this guy is totally annoying. And most importantly he got his job from faxing a short story to a movie executive, which leads me to believe my mother did not really retain the most essential message from the article. What would be more interesting is how this guy got the movie exec's fax number - maybe if he could pass it out, or any executive's fax number who has enough time in their day to read short stories from unknown individuals that land in their fax trays, or inboxes, or whatever the fax machine components are called.

Here's a picture of me having a job:

Well ok, I actually have no desire to look into anyone's mouth like ever, for any reason, but I like this woman's style.

Thanks for nothing mom!